nemesis

"all in love is fair", it was sang!

"are we even in love?", it was asked!

" if we fail this time, it will be a failure of imagination!", it was clarified...

...because the world had indeed been placed in the palm of their hands!...

no clown!

"Twas brillig, and the slithy toves. Did gyre and gimble in the wabe?" asked Jabberwocky. But the truth is, we might never know! Anyway, I have always had an intense relationship with my hair... Recently, I've been wearing it dyed. It has been red-browner, instead of the original brown-black shade. Last time I did it...it got... quite orange!!! I l-o-v-e it....but I've been having to tell people who are shocked at the "strong" effect, that I went to the movies to watch "Alice in Wonderland", and cannot explain why or how I came out looking as I do...

i love...books!

i cannot live without... books!!

i want a life that's

don't you too?

...there are always

to make...

i once heard...

...only in repetition is there beauty!

...must be the perpetual flux...

going, going...

GONE!

HYBRID SOLUTION

what am i supposed to do,

if the best part of me is

always you?

parlay

There's overpowering, unfinished-business behind requests to meet on neutral territory to confess and commiserate over the “no-drama”, plus appeals to "drop me a line when you're free." So you all could still find yourselves landed in the kangaroo-court with a lap full of "just-desserts", or up-the-creek-without-a-paddle, gaping in wondrous rapture and disbelief as if drawn by pied-piper. Yet even forced to sink or swim in the naked truth among titanic consequences, hope is revived by resurrecting Pandora's buried-treasure abducted from the emotional wreckage! An initially liberating sight-for-sore-eyes at the end of the beginning. So, prepare to dig deep for an honest appraisal of your intentions and responses, because when things get hot, you'll both be called to the carpet and any attempts at standing on ceremony with ritual mockery or feigned formalities will be utterly transparent, costing audience support or backdoor access to sadness.

(That we be as the head, and not as the tail.)

( - Yet tails have the purpose of giving "balance"!!!-)

ah! ça, alors!

it is best to see eye-to-eye, when being face-to-face

Asi nos hubieran visto, estabamos ahi sentados frente a frente

No podia faltarnos la luna y hablabamos de todo un poco y todo nos causaba risa - como dos tontos

Y yo que no veia la hora de tenerte en mis brazos y poderte decir...

Te amo

Desde el primer momento en que te vi

Y hace tiempo te buscaba y ya te imaginaba asi

Te amo

Aunque no es tan facil de decir

Y defino lo que siento con estas palabras

Te amo

Y de pronto nos rodeo el silencio y nos miramos fijamente uno al otro

Tus manos entre las mias

Talvez nos volveremos a ver

Mañana no se si podre, ¿que estas jugando?

Me muero si no te vuelvo a ver

Y tenerte en mis brazos y poderte decir...

Te amo

i feel as if in a haze

for me, it's you!

...waiting...

make.believe

duh!

iT’s not WHO you are

that hoLds you Back ;

it’s who you

think you are noT!

"Please Look After This Bear!"

About Paddington Bear on the platform of Metro Center Station

...on the bear’s fiftieth anniversary, he finds himself almost in trouble with the police after they realize he is, in fact, a refugee from darkest Peru, rather than well-behaved and very British.

...a beloved, classic bear, fantastically funny, long-awaited...

(Shouldn't bears from Peru wear black hats?!)

most pictures have him with a red hat

i think i am falling in love

for real, for real!

(post edited may 1st, 2010)

Choose Love over Fear

" A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer;

it sings because it has a song!"

Lou Holtz

i drew...

"FLOWERS ARE A PROUD ASSERTION THAT A RAY OF BEAUTY SURPASSES ALL THE UTILITIES OF THE WORLD."

P in DC

I need a sign to let me know you're here

All of these lines are being crossed over the atmosphere

I need to know that things are gonna look up

'Cause I feel us drowning in a sea spilled from a cup

When there is no place safe and no safe place to put my head

When you feel the world shake from the words that are said

And I'm calling all angels

I'm calling all you angels

I won't give up

If you don’t give up

I need a sign to let me know you're here

'Cause my TV set just keeps it all from being clear

I want a reason for the way things have to be

I need a hand to help build up some kind of hope inside of me

I won't give up

If you don’t give up

When children have to play inside so they don't disappear

And private eyes solve marriage lies cause we don't talk for years

And football teams are kissing Queens

And losing sight of having dreams

In a world that what we want is only what we want until it's ours

I won't give up

If you don’t give up

Calling all you angels

(by Train -again!)

we all have it

why is it so hard to use it?

it's obvious

But I'm not going to apologize for it!

give myself to you

When I find out who I am

I'm gonna know just what to do

When I pull myself together again

I'm gonna give myself to you

Is this forever?

This feelin' I got

Not enough and too much

So free and so caught up

In somethin' and nothin'

Both at the same time

I'm either out of my head

Or I'm out of my mind

When I find out who I am

I'm gonna know just what to do

When I pull myself together again

I'm gonna give myself to you

Is this forever?

This feelin' that I'm not

Movin' at all

But I just can't stop it

Its like I'm dreamin'

And I'm wide awake too

Will you remember me

Cause I won't forget you

When I find out who I am

I'm gonna know just what to do

When I pull myself together again

I'm gonna give myself to you

I guess I was savin' my life for later

When maybe I should've been givin' myself to you

Now I will, but I got to find out who I am before I do...

Before I do

When I find out who I am I'm gonna know just what to do

When I pull myself together again I know, I'm gonna give myself to you

I'm gonna give myself to you

I'm gonna give myself to you

(TRAIN)

the boat and the...

... i want to set roots!

Is this what God has in mind for me?

What a tsunami!

DISCLAIMER

Written usually in small print, disclaimers are supposed to guarantee a form of overall protection from getting somehow f***** -up by some unpredictable turn around of events and circumstances, blah, blah, blah...

I have no idea what it is I am so afraid of! Feelings? My own? Because they are so unmeasurable? ...I never cared for statistics anyway - they are manipulated to serve the pending goal. I have always profeced interest solely in intensity! So when I get it, I chicken-out? Or am I scared of my fertile imagination? Of having wishful- thought this prize? Frightened of getting hurt? ....certainly what's making me suffer is this desire! The lack of a lighthouse. The need for a port. The wish for an anchor. To fly away with the passing wind...? To be on an island...? To swim in a creek...?

This is so serious

Arrival

I feel liberated at last to make a break or hit where it really hurts. It's an unrestrained, practically unconscious and unavoidable free-for-all clawing for control and protection of my sense of self ensues -- ripping to shreds the last vestiges of any façade of calm composure. And what else could be expected in the face of such extreme folly and upon release from self-imposed bondage? ... to strut my stuff, and escape to my own anthem at last!

There's a degree of ironic symmetry to being enveloped in the asylum of this supposedly reviled, contemptible thing. Prevailing winds liken it to the monster under the bed, the ghost-story or hidden threat of danger. Yet with adrenaline pumping and scared of being ripped to shreds, I can't help but give chase and sneak a peek into the underbelly of the ravenous, illicit passions of the other-half -- from a distance. And perhaps it's worth investigating if only to identify that which I can't yet accept in myself.

Message

No-one on earth could feel like this.

I'm thrown and overblown with bliss.
There must be an angel
Playing with my heart.
I walk into an empty room
And suddenly my heart goes "boom"!
It's an orchestra of angels
And they're playing with my heart.
(Must be talking to an angel)

And when I think that I'm alone

It seems there's more of us at home.
It's a multitude of angels
And they're playing with my heart.

I must be hallucinating
Watching angels celebrating.
Could this be reactivating
All my senses dislocating?
This must be a strange deception
By celestial intervention.
Leavin' me the recollection
Of our heavenly connection

SPRING!

"The Way You Make Me Feel"

Hee-Hee! Ooh! Go On Girl! Aaow!

Hey Pretty Baby With The High Heels On

You Give Me Fever Like I've Never, Ever Known

You're Just A Product Of Loveliness

I Like The Groove Of Your Walk,Your Talk, Your Dress

I Feel Your Fever From Miles Around

I'll Pick You Up In My Car

And We'll Paint The Town

Just Kiss Me Baby

And Tell Me Twice

That You're The One For Me

The Way You Make Me Feel (The Way You Make Me Feel)

You Really Turn Me On (You Really Turn Me On)

You Knock Me Off Of My Feet (You Knock Me Off Of My Feet)

My Lonely Days Are Gone (My Lonely Days Are Gone)

I Like The Feelin' You're Givin' Me

Just Hold Me Baby And I'm In Ecstasy

Oh I'll Be Workin' From Nine To Five

To Buy You Things To Keep You By My Side

I Never Felt So In Love Before

Just Promise Baby,

You'll Love Me Forevermore

I Swear I'm Keepin' You Satisfied

'Cause You're The One For Me

Acha-Ooh! Go On Girl! Go On! Hee! Hee! Aaow! Go On Girl!

Ain't Nobody's Business, Ain't Nobody's Business

(The Way You Make Me Feel)

Ain't Nobody's Business, Ain't Nobody's Business But Mine And My Baby

(You Really Turn Me On)

Hee Hee!

(You Knock Me Off Of My Feet)

Hee Hee! Ooh!

(My Lonely Days Are Gone)

Give It To Me-Give Me Some Time

(The Way You Make Me Feel)

Come On Be My Girl-I Wanna Be With Mine

(You Really Turn Me On)

Ain't Nobody's Business-

(You Knock Me Off Of My Feet)

Ain't Nobody's Business But Mine And My Baby's

Go On Girl! Aaow!

(My Lonely Days Are Gone)

Hee Hee! Aaow!

Chika-Chika

Chika-Chika-Chika

Go On Girl!-Hee Hee!

(The Way You Make Me Feel)

Hee Hee Hee!

(You Really Turn Me On)

(You Knock Me Off My Feet)

(My Lonely Days Are Gone)

(The Way You Make Me Feel)

(You Really Turn Me On)

(You Knock Me Off My Feet)

(My Lonely Days Are Gone)

(above is my first painting ever, which measures 29x22 inches and is done in gouache and markers, dated December 2008)

ASSERTIVENESS ASSERTIVENESS ASSERTIVENESS

JUST BECAUSE IT IS WRITTEN, DOESN'T MEAN IT IS TRUE!!!!!

Hey, Soul Sister!

Heeey, Heeeeey, Heeeeeey.

Your lipstick stains, on the front lobe of my left side brains,

I knew I wouldn't forget ya, and so I went and let you blow my mind.

Your sweet moon-beam, the smell of you in every single dream I dream.

I knew when we collided, you're the one I have decided,

Who's one of my kind.

Hey, Soul Sister, ain't that mister mister on the radio, stereo,

The way you move ain't fair you know.

Hey, Soul Sister, I don't wanna miss a single thing you dooooo...

Tonight.

Heeey Heeeeey Heeeeeey...

Just in time, I´m so glad you have a one-track mind like me.

You gave my life direction,

A game show love connection, we can't deny...

I´m so obsessed, my heart is bound to beat right out my untrimmed chest.

I believe in you, like a virgin you're Madonna,

And I'm always gonna wanna blow your mind...

Hey, Soul Sister, ain't that mister mister on the radio, stereo,

The way you move ain't fair you know.

Hey, Soul Sister, I don't wanna miss a single thing you dooooo...

Tonight,

Way you can cut a rug,

Watching you's the only drug I need.

So gangster, I'm so thug,

You're the only one I'm dreaming of you see.

I can be myself now finally,

In fact there's nothing I can't be,

I want the world to see you be, with me,

Hey, Soul Sister, ain't that mister mister on the radio, stereo,

The way you move ain't fair you know.

Hey, Soul Sister, I don't wanna miss a single thing you do tonight...

Hey, Soul Sister, I don't wanna miss a single thing you dooooo...

Tonight.

Heeey, Heeeeey, Heeeeeey, tonight.

Heeey, Heeeeey, Heeeeeey.

Tonight.

(by Train)

Desperate Housewives?

Forever can never be long enough for meFeel like I've had long enough with youForget the world now we won't let them seeBut there's one thing left to doNow that the weight has liftedLove has surely shifted my wayMarry MeToday and every dayMarry MeIf I ever get the nerve to sayHello in this cafeSay you wilMm-hmmSay you willMm-hmmTogether can never be close enough for meFeel like I am close enough to youYou wear white and I'll wear out the words I loveAnd you're beautifulNow that the wait is overAnd love and has finally shown her my wayMarry meToday and every dayMarry meIf I ever get the nerve to say hello in this cafeSay you willMm-hmmSay you willMm-hmmPromise meYou'll always beHappy by my sideI promise toSing to youWhen all the music diesAnd marry meToday and everydayMarry meIf I ever get the nerve to say hello in this cafeSay you willMm-hmmSay you willMarry meMm-hmm

(marry me lyrics, by train)

joie de vivre

can

it

get

any

more

self-

ab

sorb...

?

?

?

?

?

?

?

?

?

bed

"blooming hell, mate!"

"what the %@#* are you talking about?!"

"f-l-i-p-p-i-n-g nothing!"

"u kare?"

"n?"

"ARGH!....imagonna izlip!"

the reality

say, speak, show...yo-yo!

yo-yo

flower power

DRAW

all i wanna do

is draw some more

i gotta a feeling

i'm not the only one!

Technology is good, but people are better

I was born in a place without a coast border, yet very surrounded by mountains, almost like an island! I do not feel attracted to the sea - it actually intimidates me. I know this is only due to my ignorance of the oceans, which leaves room for exploration - that is a good thing... Mountains on the other hand, give me a sense of serenity and I think they are majestic! Another aspect mountains inspire in me is curiosity - they always make me want to know what is after or behind them! So I suppose that is one of the reasons I have kept moving, relocating...

I read this "THE FIREBIRD" children's book today. The story told in the book is of Russian folklore. Wow! I wish to draw non-stop!

(I wrote this post, because I believe there is a reason for everything...)

-arched back and toothless-

"the" last week of "this" winter (*)

...on a dating site i was once a member of, a guy who read my carefully detailed profile wrote to me saying he thought i was a real "flower child", or a very good attempt at pretending and faking it - he was going to invest on discovering which!

(*)but of course, even "when" winter actually is, depends on a perspective point of view of which hemisphere one happens to be speaking from!!!

(i drew this flower for CC yesterday!)

Delicious!

This was the colour of my first bra!

Thank you, tia L!

66 skies: winter is ALMOST over!

This old man, he played "one"

He played knick-knack on my "head",

Knick-knack paddywhack,

Give a dog a bone,

This old man came rolling home!

(this is painfully and diabolically funny!)

Temperance

The Temperance card in a tarot deck is ruled by Sagittarius. A Sagittarius can be hard is to interpret, but never uninteresting!...

...So this is how the story goes, from the tarot perspective: continuing on his spiritual path, the Fool begins to wonder how to reconcile the opposites that he's been facing: material and spiritual (which he hung between as the Hanged man), death and birth (the one leading into the other in the Death card). It is at this point that he comes upon a winged figure standing with one foot in a brook, the other on a rock. The radiant creature pours something from one flask into another. Drawing closer, the Fool sees that what is being poured from one flask is fire, while water flows from the other. The two are being blended together! "How can you mix fire and water?" the Fool finally whispers. Never pausing the Angel answers, "You must have the right vessels and the right proportions." The Fool watches with wonder. "Can this be done with all opposites?" he asks. "Indeed," the Angel replies, "Any oppositions, fire and water, man and woman, thesis and anti-thesis, can be made to harmonize. It is only a lack of will and a disbelief in the possibility of unity that keeps opposites, opposite." And that is when the Fool begins to understand that he is the one who is keeping his universe in twain, holding life/death, material world and spiritual world separate. In him, the two could merge, as in the vessels that the Angel uses to pour the elements, one to the other. All it takes, the Fool realizes, is the right proportions....and the right vessel.

The symbolism of an Angel represented in the card is very precise, for Sagittarius is the sign of merging seemingly impossible opposites: a "winged" being/person from Heaven on Earth; a centaur, both beast and man in a unique creature; best of all, there is the bow and arrow, one moving, one stationary, working together to point the way. Temperance may be, at first glance, a warning to "temper" behavior, which could be fitting in the skillful use of diplomacy and negotiation to reach equilibrium or a middle path, searched by Sagittarius. But it may also be a reminder of the power of imaginative and expansive thinking: that seemingly irreconcilable opposites may not be irreconcilable at all. Belief that fiery red and watery blue cannot be merged may be the only thing standing in the way of blending the two - change the belief, measure out each with care, and you can create otherworldly violet. ...the possibility of a balanced life, with spiritual, emotional and material needs met - a "tempered" satisfaction with life's gifts!!!

I personally envision "magic" and "miracle" here: I see "alchemy" happening and the harmony and integration of both sides of one same thing. To me it is the Sagittarian desire to find a unified field theory, a way of blending opposites, achieving synthesis. The Temperance card announces that thesis and anti-thesis can and should be put together to get the even more useful synthesis. It is the coming true of a dream or a fantasy of unity through individuality. It requires experimentation, concentrated work, time, care, patience, yet it is possible. The result is the most marvelous blend. It is also a reminder that a bow and arrow are useless apart, but together a formidable artifact.

I AM DEDICATED TO FINDING...

YET SOME PARANOID PEOPLE HAVE THOUGHT I HAVE BEEN LAUGHING AT THEM!

my words

I suppose my friend who says I am now in the process of finding the ideal WORDS to express my FEELINGS, is right! After all, my holistic therapist was kind enough to recently find understandable WORDS to describe to me how I am a "specialist" in HEAVEN or SKY, by which he actually meant FLYING...

The whole dilemma must be due to the fact that I am fluent in four different languages, not to boast, but to explain my eternal desperation to always have dictionaries handy! (Some nasty being even once described my status as being "illiterate in four different languages", but we'll just ignore him, won't we?...in the end, he did go bonkers!)

I have no wish to be published. Honestly. Doesn't that spare me of something?

The only thing that makes me really m-a-d, is when my first name gets mis-spelt!!! UGH!